You Will Share In My Pain

Guys, when you hit up the urinal, what is the last thing you want to see?  If you said naked senile old man, I’m right there with you.   Sadly about 5 minutes ago, the Gods decided to spite me.

After lunch, I entered the restroom and headed straight for the urinals.  As my bladder emptied out, I overheard an elderly man in one of the stalls profusely cursing.  Ignoring the senior’s remarks, I continued to excrete the remaining waste within my body.  With the reservoirs drained and a quick jiggle, I zipped up my shorts and proceeded to head out of the bathroom.

To my dismay, the man was no longer in the urinal but up and about in the bathroom with his pants down to his ankles.  Nothing was left to the imagination: pasty white skin, jungles of pubic hair, and a wrinkled white ass full of sores, pimples, and other almost unnatural things.  Thankfully, the initial shock was instantaneous, and I was able to turn around and allow the man to go back to the stall.

Once the doors to the stall were locked, I quickly made my way to sink, washed my hands, and bolted down the hallway.

While the Gods played this terrible prank, two things could have made the situation worse:
1.  I was closer to the man, thereby getting a more in depth look.
2.  My reaction time was slower, thereby getting a more in depth look.

I am grateful I did not see his penis.  Otherwise, I would have called out the rest of my shift, citing “mental duress.”

Now, I have recently been inclined to place photographs with each entry to supplement the writing.  Lucky for you, I am not a voyeurist,a peeping tom, mentally unstable.  There will be no pictures.

After this incident, I’m thinking about going for counseling.

~ by Erik on Tuesday, June 24, 2008.